Modeling 101: Model With a Disability?

Story by Cassie Hepler

When you look at me, you would never know that ironically I have a C-shaped spinal curve (C for Cassie!) lingering beneath all these organs, muscle and tissue. My name is Cassie Hepler and I have as of fall of 2014, a 42 degree lower lumbar curve in my spine called scoliosis. I remember being a child, bending over and touching my toes and the doctor saying, “You have scoliosis,” but that meant nothing to me as a child. When I was in college, I remember taking polaroids of myself in a bikini with my best friend and noticing that I sort of leaned to the left (as my dad likes to joke, he always knew that I did). My mom and I went on a spine consultation at Geisinger (in central Pennsylvania, where I’m from and went to school at Penn State), and talked with the doctor. He discouraged me from getting surgery for “cosmetic reasons” and had me speak with a girl who had the surgery. She was quick to tell me of all the pain she is now in from the steel rods soaking in the winter weather, constantly at the doctor’s office and bumping her head. Once the spine is fortified with metal and depending on your curve degree, the only saving grace is that you gain a few inches (from 1-3 inches is normal). At 16 years old, I was almost 5″8, now I am just shy of 5″7 so perhaps after surgery, I will be 5″9 or thereabouts. I decided against surgery and wait until the pain, numbness of pinched nerves or more were imminent. And so far, so good until this past year.

I felt more pain than usual while shooting kids sports photos each season and even sometimes modeling. I knew something was up and thanks to Obamacare (as a freelancer/entrepreneur), I booked an appointment at Jefferson with Dr. Joshua Heller. Just as I suspected, I progressed from 38 degrees in 2008 to 42 degrees in 2014, just one degree shy of needing surgery. So we formulated a plan of physical therapy (with NovaCare in Bala Cynwyd) with a therapist who is much more like a trainer, strengthening all the muscles around my spine like a boned corset.

Much like other hidden “disabilities” (I put it in quotations because I never felt disabled per say), there are tons of celebrities with scoliosis, the most notable being Chloe Sevigny. I have never felt less than a person with a straight spine (although lately have been having a sort of straight spine envy like others have I want bigger boobs, smaller butt envy). There are things I can no longer do now that I’m older and less Gumby-like such as lift heavy objects off the ground. I will never have ripped abs (maybe after surgery… eventually I will need it said my spine doctor). I will always ironically lean to the left until then. There have been a couple of modeling shoots where the photographer says, “Stand straight!” And I reply, “I am!” Most of my cherished photographer friends are excellent about my back problems. And if someone doesn’t want to work with me because I did not win the spinal lottery of life, so be it. Then they probably are not compassionate enough to truly emote a beautiful photograph anyway. (Another model with back problems although not scoliosis is the sweet Chelsea Christian and her work is outstanding).

I have been blessed to have a pretty successful writing, editing (and now publishing), photography, modeling and acting career so far. Most people are amazed (including my physical therapist) that I am as active as I am with the curve I have. She said it is mostly because of yoga, which I sort of began shying away from the hardcore pilates in 2008 to a more fluid, gentle approach with yoga from then until now. Staying physically fit perhaps was a blessing and/or side effect from modeling but it has kept my spine – and spirits bright. Recently, I had a construction truck back into my car. What might be a tiny annoyance for someone with a straight spine can quickly escalade into more pain for us crooked folks. And it did, just like slipping on the ice Monday morning and landing all my weight on my left butt cheek (which then crept into my back and even shoulders). But just like the ice on the sidewalk can’t keep me down for long, neither can my crooked spine. At this point it is a challenge to see how long I can go without surgery. And I love a good challenge!